Are men rapist ?

Recently I came across this news, that according to this survey, women cheating on their spouse mostly never get caught, but men do. [link:]. Though the numbers can be debated, one thing is clear, that women do cheat on their partner!

In our country, now-a-days we are quite vocal about crime against women. Media is always abuzz about such news, new laws are made / altered to prevent them. We have set up a Ministry to look into women centric issues specifically as well. United Nations are also very vocal about it, and spending billions of money to stop it. However, it seems there’s no stopping in crime. Reason: According to them, Men. Yes, at least that is how it is portrayed. As if men have single point agenda is to commit crime against women, as much as possible.

Let me try to delve deep into it. In Indian context, most common crime against women are rape and molestation prior to marriage and post marriage it is dowry harassment. Well, there are other crimes too, but people are more vocal around these 3 now a days. In this piece, I would concentrate mostly on rape in general, excluding marital rape.

Rape – It is a type of sexual abuse, and all over the world, this is looked at as a heinous act. India is no different. When a victim is raped, the victim definitely faces irreparable loss; mental, psychological, physical, to come extent social as well.

All over the world, it has been accepted as a gender neutral act, which means a man can also be raped. but unfortunately not in India. Here either our lawmakers have reasons to believe that men can not be raped, or they intentionally do not want to make it gender neutral.

Apart from law, comes the social bias. In our country, unfortunately even in this 21st century, if a man cries that he has been harassed by a woman, he becomes a joke in the society. Everybody, including men also, starts looking at him as a inferior person. He will be ridiculed with comments like “dekh ladki ke haato pit ke aaya hai (look at him, he was beaten by a lady)”. Bravery for men and women differ significantly. While an man is expected to be a rough, tough, strong, bold and brave human but mostly, for women it is often portrayed as the power to speak up. Strange but true. Take example of Nisha Sharma. She was portrayed as the Iron lady of India, back in 2003, when she showed the courage to speak up (called off her marriage at the last moment for alleged demand of dowry which now has been proved to be false).[link:]. And whenever, a woman speaks up against a man, immediately the man is turned into a villain, no body bothers to find out what is the truth.

Even today, if a woman speaks up against her marriage / schooling / lodges rape or molestation case, she is hailed. This is done in two ways, on one hand she is appreciated for showing such courage and coming forward, on the other hand a hue and cry is raised portraying men as villains – as if men are born only to rape / molest every woman they come across. This is the sole purpose, single point agenda of a mans life !! But is this really true ? Are men really like that ? Are men really hailed in society if they say rape or molest a lady ? Are you aware of any society / community / locality where most eligible / brave man is the person who has raped / molested maximum women ?? Guys, look around yourself who feel men are only criminals, do you really believe you father / brother / uncles / friends all are out on the street with a single point agenda of raping / molesting women ?

Still, there are a section of men, who commit these crimes and they are simply criminals and they should be dealt strictly in accordance with law, no second thought about that.

Similarly, there are women also, who commit various crimes. When those women are termed as criminals, when no one raises a voice when a woman files a false criminal case labeling that woman as a criminal, why all men are only portrayed as criminals? Of late, there are few cases, as listed below, came to my notice, where women are increasingly misusing rape law. Cases are reported from every corner of the country, from Kolkata to Mumbai to Delhi to Chennai. Is there any punishment for these ladies for falsely harassing innocent men ? Is anyone vocal about this ? Is there any media coverage highlighting the misuse?

1. Chetla, Kolkata: Maid leveled rape charge, man jailed for 3 days, then she changed her statement and claimed it is a false story. Man then released on Bail.

2. Chennai: Women lodge rape case, when years of live-in relationship turns sour. So in case a live in relationship breaks, man has to bear the burn. It has to be his fault only ??

3. New Delhi: Another classic case, a love turned live in relation of 7 years, they have a kid of who is 4 years old. Now the lady claims rape.

4. Mumbai – Shiney Ahuja: Perhaps the most famous false rape case. He was convicted despite the victim later confessed it was a false case. Judge felt she had given false evidence hence convicted him for 7 years RI.

5. Chandigarh: 2 guys and 2 girls eloped and returned their village after 11 years. They were married and having kids. Still they were charged with rape !!! This time strangely the ladies did not complain, but the police did. they thought when they eloped, ladies were minor and they might have had sex !!!

6. Delhi & NCR: Tehelka Sting Operation: Most shocking revelation. 40 police officers in and around Delhi and NCR reveals their experience in a sting operation where the media approached them as researched scholars. In their experience, most of the cases are consensual sex turned rape cases !

7. London: Woman filed false rape case as she after having consensual sex with 3 men as she later on regretted her decision. Result the lady landed in Jail. This happened in London. Can we ever imagine such thing happening in India ? There are ample example where women after having consensual sex, cries rape. Even wives cry rape by husbands. And not to mention many of them are false, like the ones in Chetla, Kolkata or Shiney Ahuja case. Probably the sting operation done by tehelka is an eye opener about the ground reality rather than what is portrayed.

8. Pinki Pramanik Case, Kolkata: Now apart from these false rape case stories, there’s another very important angle that came out during the popular rape case news of athlete Pinki Pramanik. She is a gold medalist in Asian Games. She was also framed in rape charges by her live in girlfriend who is a divorcee. Result: She was jailed for 26 days, lost her railways job. Later the alleged victim confessed that she lied as someone else has asked her to do so ![link:]. Later after a lot of medical drama, it was decided that she is incapable of raping someone. [link:]

This particular case, IMHO, gives raise to another important question apart from the existing one of consequences of a false rape case, if rape laws needs to be made gender neutral. For the persons who believe rape can only be done by a male on female only, then please read this: There are ample example and conviction too for other rape cases.

Courts from time to time came down harshly against the misuse [link:]. But nothing has been done yet to stop it.

Whats most significant here is way back in 2007, honorable supreme court of India, has ruled that consensual sex does not amount to rape.[link:], [link to the judgement:]. Think logically, if two adult human being decides to have sex with each other, then it is very much clear that both the persons gave their consent to the act. The problem starts when the lady, after the act, for some reason, claims that she did not gave consent, ditto the lady from London, who is now in jail !! Unfortunately in India, consent does not make any sense in Law despite supreme court guideline. So according to them, a lady can not wish to have sex, and even if she does that forcefully, she is not committing any crime !!

IMHO, criminals are criminals. There should not be any classification amongst them. When in one hand there are crime against women, and to control that we need law and order, on the other hand we should not just use that as an excuse to make laws that does not consider what happens if someone files a false case. We need to be mature to understand that, as we can not bring down the crime numbers to zero, at the same time, we can not assume all the crime that are reported has to be true only.

IMHO, no law and order body in this world can claim that they are successful in stopping all crime from happening. But what the places having best law and order managed to do is how they handle the situation after a crime has been committed. That is what makes the difference.


3 thoughts on “Are men rapist ?

  1. Recently came across this news article, about friendship between opposite sexes. Well according to this study, it most likely to end up in a romantic relationship. While, according to this study, it is mostly because of men:

    Now, there’s another news article that also came into my notice, that 50% single women, engage is sex with their ex, while they search for their next lovers.
    So, while it is not looked at as a sin while these women go on to cheat 2 men at the same time, but the problem will start the moment any of these women will lament their decision of having sex with their exes. They will simply and easily cry foul as being raped…..those men will be villenized, society will shower their sympathy on the abla naris !!!

    So, on one hand, it really supports me in the question that I had raised through this post of mine quite some time back, which gives me a bit feel good factor as I feel I was quite right, at the same time and most importantly, it raises a question in my mind… men, are we really living at the mercy of these women ?

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